global warming isn't a myth but doesn't have to end the world

Everyone talks about the good old days like they were the best times. Maybe they were but we can't go back in time! Nowadays, everyone is more interested in stopping the end of the world than believing that it doesn't have to end!!
World peace is probaby never going to happen because politicians and other people in power are all so convinced they have the answers and try to force them on everyone else with other views!
One option for the world end is for aliens from another planet to come and take over the world. If there are aliens and they ever do come to take over earth, they would find it pretty easy because the world is so busy fighting with each other that we would probably not notice until it was too late!
Another option for the world end is World War III. This definitely seems the most probable way because the West think they can use brute force and ignorance to solve the world's problems which is stupid! All that war does is kill thousands of innocent people. Soldiers are admirable to fight for their country and that is their choice but so many people forget the innocent lives wiped out by war. Defenseless people that are just in the wrong place at the wrong time! Everyone is defenseless in a way. Nobody knows what the future holds, we can all speculate but there really is nobody living that can say for certain what will happen! The only certainty in life is that we will die but who has the right to tell someone how or when that will be? We need to stop searching for the fame and fortune that everyone seems to be wanting these days! Scientific people want to find cures for illnesses or discover new illnesses to name after themselves so their legacy lives on forever! Creative people want to become rich from doing what they love. They are all allowed to live in their own little bubble. What about the rest of the world's population? Ones that maybe never had the best start in life, have a degenerative illness that stops them being able to physically do much or even ones that had children young and now feel their life has to revolve around their chidren.
I have always lived in a bubble but it burst 5 years ago when I was diagnosed with Devic's Disease! I fought for a second opinion from a specialist who said I had an unusual form of MS. This was obviously still devastating but not as bad as the original diagnosis. I was fine with that. I tried going back to uni to finish my Psychology degree, determined that an illness wouldn't stop me fulfilling my dream of being a primary school teacher. After a year and a bit, I had to give up. My legs were getting bad and I couldn't always make it to class which was making it hard to keep up. I started to get very depressed and seen the rest of my life being left by myself and alone. I never thought anyone would want me because I had an illness that made my future so unpredictable! Then I met a girl who also had the same thing. I was happy-ish or so I thought. She opened my eyes to the world of spirituality which I had never really thought about before. I was brought up as a Christian but always believed in Karma too. She made me look forward for the first time in my life. I looked forward to old age because I wouldn't be alone. I realised that I had always been so focused on my dream of being a primary teacher that I had neglected to put all the knowledge I had accumulated over the years to good use. I had always just gone with the flow in life, letting my head rule my heart, always searching for answers to things I didn't understand.
I was blessed with intelligence from a young age. I was always top in my class for most things. In high school, I was never the greatest at English. I still passed all my tests and exams, ended up with a C for higher. I was happy just to pass the exam. To me, maths was always my favourite subject. I found it really easy and had an awesome teacher for standard grade, higher and advanced higher. I loved passing exams and got a good feeling at succeeding academically. I was, and still am, a very practically minded person. Numbers and science made sense to me.  I was also very creative. I loved drawing and making things with my hands. At school, I done Graphic Communication and Craft and Design which were my fun subjects but still very practical and methodical. I loved the balance I had at school. After I left school, and got rejected from University to do teaching, I started working in a bank. It was ok, I loved serving customers and being given responsibility but I hated the sales targets. I never understood why customers should be bombarded with questions about where they had their mortgage/home insurance/inverstments etc when all they wanted to do was get their money out or pay something in! People aren't stupid, if they wanted advice on services, they would ask! My manager was a bitch too, always picking on me for not meeting my targets but not taking into account all the administrative work I done that others weren't expected to. It was annoying. Anyway, to get out of leaving my 'proper' job, I applied to go and do Psychology at Uni as I knew this could lead to teaching. Longer path to my dream job but I knew it would be worth it in the end. I got accepted and was so happy.
I had to choose another 2 modules as Psychology only covered one and the Uni I was at required you to do 3 per semester. I took Maths, because it was easy to me, and Philosophy. I only took Philosophy bacause it was only 3 hours of classes a week and I reckoned it would make my 1st year a little easier. Lazy approach to choosing modules I know! I was the only one doing that combination of modules, bit of a random one I know but I've always been a bit weird! :)
Anyway, after 1st year, I had good grades, passed all my modules with As or Bs (A for maths, B for other two). I decided to move to the same town as my Uni to make going to class easier in 2nd year because Maths was at 9 every morning. I moved in with a classmate from my maths class which was great fun. We had an epic summer. By the end of it I wasn't feeling well, had numb arm and leg. The numbness got worse and worse until I eventually collapsed in the shower one day and ended up in hospital for 5 weeks learning to walk again. It was a hard 5 weeks but I got through it and got home, even if it was on crutches and having other problems. Few months later it happened again. Although I wasn't in hospital as long this time round. Then my consultant diagnosed Devic's Disease. It was a huge blow and I didn't really know what to do any more. I think at this point I gave up. I turned in to a complete hypocondriac, was at the doctors a LOT and ended up at one point taking 40 odd pills a day! I know I'm complaining but I also know there are a lot of people out there on similar amounts but to me, someone who had never really been one for going to the doctor, I hated it. The only type I refused to take were anti depressants. I grew up watching my mum on them and always vowed never to take them!
 Anyway, after a couple of pretty tough years, I met my ex. She was on lots of pills too and we, to start with, were good for each other. Looking back, I know I only liked the fact that she lived 600 miles away and it meant I got to run away from the stresses of life for a few weeks at a time and do as little as possible. At home, I just sat and thought about my illness too much and how it was getting in the way of me living my dreams! She moved up to live with me about 8 months after we got together and it was then that I started to regret having rushed things. I felt responsible for her, more like her mum than her partner. I knew ALL her issues because she relived and retold them almost every day. I felt sorry for her and wanted to try and help her be happy and enjoy her life. It came to the point that I had said I would move back down to her hometown to make her happy but I had a lot of things to put right in my head first.
My nana has alzheimers and is 87 so I told her I wouldn't move before she passed away because I couldn't bear the thought of leaving my mum to cope with all of that by herself. Her brother is pretty useless with caring for my nana. Hardly visits and would probably have a fit if asked to help physically care for her! However, my ex was too impatient and kept pushing me to up sticks and leave and she pushed me in to making a choice between my family and friends, and her. In the end I couldn't choose but she made it easy for me and left. She messed with my head a lot because of her spiritual beliefs. She thought she had all the answers but she never! She would overdose on most of her medication which is not healthy and wouldn't listen to me when I said she needed to try and stop. It definitely made me feel like her mum. The fact that we rarely had sex kind of reinforced my view that she saw me as an easy option, rather than actually loving me in the right ways. I know sex isn't everything in a relationship but it is important.
I went through a bit of a breakdown and realised that my heart was always in the right place with whatever I did and it took meeting my new girlfriend for me to realise that my ex leaving wasn't my fault and that heartbreak doesn't mean the end of the world.
My life journey so far has taught me a lot; physically, academically and emotionally. It has also shown me that there is more to life than education, although education is important and shouldn't be wasted. Now, I see clearly for the first time ever and can see exactly what is wrong with the world. Nobody believes in the happily ever after fantasy any more, mainly because the people at the top of the power pyramid have too much power and feel like they have the right to dictate to people at the bottom how they should lead their lives.
I have always treated people how I want to be treated, as a result I have lots of awesome friends but knew something was missing which I searched for in education but, now I know what it is...someone who loves me despite my physical problems and LISTENS to me!
I have always had faith in the system in this country as it got me to where I am now but a 'system' is just a way to control everyone and make them all carbon copies of one another. I have never followed the crowd and always been a bit backwards, I'm left handed so I have literally been backwards to all of my friends and immediate family. The government could easily ammend the system and some laws in order to make people feel a bit more free and able to determine what their life will lead to rather than making people that are not academic feel like failures from a young age!
 Two laws that I think should be revised are cannabis and euthanasia being illegal. Cannabis is about the only drug type thing that helps me relax, trust me I've tried a LOT! It is only psychologically addictive because life is psychologically addictive but it helps ease frustrations people face every day and helps people be a bit more laid back! I believe that if it was legal, people who do not work would be more likely to try and work because they would then be paying tax off of their wages to support a country that actually cares rather than one that tries to control the way they live their life! I know a lot of 'stoners' and none of them are arrogant, aggressive or lazy, unlike the alcoholics I know (my dad being one of the latter group) so I really cannot see why it cannot be legalised.
Another thing that should be legalised is euthanasia. I had never really thought about it much until I got ill with a long term degenerative illness. I am only in my mid 20's and have been through a lot of treatments for it but I hope that if it gets to the point where I am in too much pain and have other problems that make life too hard any more then I could choose to end my life instead of being forced to stay alive when I don't want to. I could die at home instead of having to go to a foreign country like Switzerland and risk a family member being arrested for taking me upon their return. No child asks to be born but surely it should be up to each individual person to decide if they have had enough of this life and want the ultimate escape from reality and die. I understand that legalising this would be a hard thing to do as a lot of religious groups would argue that it is a sin to kill yourself and should let nature take it's course but what about the large portion of the population that have no religious belief? Or think that the world doesn't make sense any more? Surely they have the right to die with dignity in the way they choose? Everybody dies, does it really matter if it's natural or not? The only thing people seem to feel like they have control over is their own life, which is true. Young people that are badly bullied at school are finding it harder to cope and we have all seen the increase in teenage suicides because talking about problems isn't done any more. I'm hopeless at talking about my problems and have been very close to suicide many times throughout my life, more so since getting ill but have never done it because I always pictured my mum at my funeral and could never put her through that when she doesn't have to. I can honestly say I haven't felt suicidal since I have been with my new girlfriend though. The more I think about it though, if euthanasia was legal then old people could choose when to die instead of just giving up and sitting waiting for it; people with terminal cancer could decide when they wanted to die instead of having to go through horrible treatment that won't cure it and have their families watch them get worse and worse, knowing all along that they could die any minute; people with illnesses like MS wouldn't see it as a death sentence as I did because they know that if it gets to the point where every day life is too hard and they can't physically or mentally carry on then they can end their life without any consequences for family members who want to help them. It makes sense. Obviously people would have to be counselled before it to make sure they really wanted to die and there wasn't something they could try first to give them a new lease of life, obviously in the case of cancer that probably woudn't be an option but they would still need to be counselled, talk them through the process and make sure their funeral and ashes/grave wishes were noted and shared with family so that nobody was in any doubt that they were the final wishes of the person and not what someone else decided for them. Nobody can live forever, death happens every day but life goes on and we can all make it to old age in one piece with our faculties in full working order if we look after ourselves without neglecting the other people that we care for and who made us who we are.
I will always be eternally grateful to my new girlfriend, she has brought me back to life after my ex. She jokes that she is just my rebound girl but I think differently, she saved me from myself and I can see a happy future with her rather than a self destructive one, dominated by someone who is in a hurry to die.
I have discussed my opinion on euthanasia with several friends. Most of the female ones can understand my reasoning as they know I'm not stupid and have been through a lot with my MS and I'm still young. A male friend seems to think that war helps reduce the population of the world so that will help global warming anyway but that's not a fair enough way for the world to run! Give people the CHOICE to leave this world, not decide for them!
I just wish someone with the power to change the law listened to me and stopped treating me like an idiot! I have faith in some sort of God type figure but whether it is the Christian, Muslim or Buddhist one is something I don't know and I'm not yet ready to find out.
I have always joked that the world will end in 2012 as many theorists seem to speculate it will but, in my opinion, the world as we know it might but it can be something as simple as the Queen dying or abdicating. I genuinely believe my nana will die next year as her heart is now randomly stopping for a few seconds at a time and she is having falls in the nursing home but I hope the actual world doesn't end because then all the children in my family won't have the chance to live their lives and reach their potential. I also hope that I don't die because I want to help all the kids see that there is an alternative to being paranoid and worry about everything that happens in the world! I guess we will all just have to wait and see and I hope that my theory is right!

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh

I think the government reckon life as a disabled person is easy! I have MS, a stress induced illness which has made me need to learn to walk again 3 times, teach myself how to cope with side effects of treatments that are supposed to 'help'. It's been a hard road! Now my DLA is up for renewal, I filled the form in months ago and sent it back. I had to call to check what was happening because the date it expired was fast-approaching and I hadn't heard anything. Got told they were waiting on reports from my GP and consultant. My date for it expiring came and went without any word so I called them again. They hadn't got the reports back so my money is now stopped until they get them. I called my consultant's secretary to find out if he had done my report yet and...HE'S ON HOLIDAY! So I have to stress myself out some more, worrying about money especially at christmas time while he is off enjoying a holiday without any financial worries and there's NOBODY in the hospital that could of done my report to save me having to go without any money for over a week!
There's an advert on tv about critical illness insurance or something and it says being diagnosed with a long term illness is hard and savings only go so far (or it was something along those lines) but, what happens if you get ill at 21 while you are in the middle of studying to become a primary school teacher and have debt rather than savings?
This is me! I had credit cards, student loan and student overdraft when I got ill and was unable to return to uni. I struggled on benefits to pay my bills every month on top of living, which I managed for almost 3 years. It got to the point where the debt was getting worse because of interest. I got help from welfare rights and eventualy, after trying many other options first, I went bankrupt! I was gutted because I felt like a complete failure! It was hardly my fault that I had MS and was unable to finish my degree and get my dream job. I got pretty depressed and was suicidal a lot but never let it beat me!
I wish the government would realise that sitting filling in a DLA form every 3 years when you have a degenerative illness is depressing! It means sitting down and realising things that have got worse since the last time and how much the body has degenerated! Surely when someone gets diagnosed with something like MS, through no fault of their own, it would take a lot of stress off of them to just award them high rate of both components for life? Then they can feel safe in the knowledge that they don't have to reflect on  how bad they are getting every 3 years when a pen pusher in an office can decide your fate by choosing whether to approve your claim! It's not going to go away, there is no cure!
Ok, rant over! I'm going to have a cup of tea and relax a little...or at least try!

A copy of the letter I wrote to David Cameron and posted but have yet to hear back...

Dear Mr Cameron,

I have one question that I would like to ask you.

I think; you fought to get Nick Clegg on your side by using some form of persuasion.  So my question to you is;

Why did you BULLY him in to siding with you?

Persuasion is just an educated form of bullying is it not?

(Courtesy of Oxford Dictionary)

(Persuade - induce someone to do something through reasoning or argument)

(Bully - a person who uses strength or influence to intimidate those who are weaker)

Your response would be along the line of; “to form a coalition, to help the Conservative party sort out all the mess left behind by Labour”

Why was siding with your party the best thing for Britain though?

According to the Conservatives website;

“David Cameron's philosophy has always been making sure people are in control and that politicians are their servants, not their masters”

That is the EXACT philosophy I wish for Britain but, I am afraid to say, I think the way you are going about it is completely WRONG!!!

We have just come out of a long decade of Labour control.  We have problems with the economy, unemployment, personal and national debt.  We are at war in so many countries all over the world to try to help their people have more control over their own country, which is a good concept, I can agree with that.  What I cannot agree with is the fact that we are constantly helping other countries while our country is set on self destruct!

Instead of UNDERSTANDING the working class and being a little bit more caring about ALL of the British population, you clamp down on benefits, cast aside people who have possibly had a hard time in life or have a disability and are probably frustrated that their bodies will not allow them to reach their full potential.  I understand that there are MANY people out there who do know how to work the ‘system’ and illegitimately claim benefits.  These types of people ruin a perfectly good concept of ‘system’.  We will always have people like this, unless we help them NOW!

The way to ‘help’ them, is not to force them to find a job so they can support their own family.  The only way, I think, is to help them work out what it is they want to do with their life first and then lead them in the right direction!

I know a LOT of people on benefits, in fact, I am one of them.  In my situation, I have MS which is not the easiest thing to live with and my body would not cope with a lot of stress.  Therefore, being told I have to work would result in me having a LOT more relapses and spending more time in hospital and needing more prescriptions on the NHS.  I really cannot see my body letting me be a reliable employee or any kind of asset to the country in monetary terms.

Most of the people I know that live on benefits; also live on anti-depressants.  They are frustrated that; they can’t find a job; the only jobs they are ‘qualified for’ are poorly paid; the job centre staff seem heartless (sometimes) and order people to get any job, whether it makes them happy or suicidal; their families have to suffer as a result of their failures in life, from school to employability; and so forth.

All we ever hear about on the news are new rules being made for benefits, more laws being passes, and more politicians shouting at each other to figure out what’s going to ‘fix’ Britain.  The statistics that we are all shown on fancy graphs generally ALL relate to MONEY!  Surely, our priorities should not be money but creating a good HAPPY place for British people to live.  We are only a little island, can just about see a dot to represent us on a small globe, so why are we so sure that our way of living is the best in the world?  Can we not learn from other countries and adopt some of their cultures to make Britain a better place?  We are, after all, now a multi-cultural society but all being forced to live by old fashioned rules and laws.

South African children do not start school until they are 7 years old.  Before this age they are taught the BASICS!  Their parents teach them how to do things for themselves so they are able to be as independent as they can.  An independent child still needs their parents to care for them but they generally grow up knowing what they want to do in life, whether it is academic or not.  I know many South African people, my closest and oldest friend is South African, and moved to Britain after beginning school so never had the experience of nursery before school as her mum was a stay-at-home mum to help bring her and her sisters up but her dad worked hard enough to provide for the whole family.  Since moving here, her mum still hasn’t worked but does not claim ANY benefits as the wages from her dad’s job is enough for them to get by, and they are happy! 

My friend now has 2 children under 5; the oldest is at nursery and could start school this year, age wise.  My friend, however, thinks he has not got the hang of being disciplined in a classroom situation.  He is at home but nursery is a different story because they are too strict with what they do and at what time.  He was never forced to have a strict routine at home as both his parents are very laid back and decide things like bed time and tea time by the kids mood rather than time of day.  They are not neglected in any form as they are the happiest children I have ever known.  Surely, that is the best thing for a child to be.  It really doesn’t matter if they are going to go on to be king or a cleaner, as long as they have a happy life.

If every person is different, then every child must be different.  Do you agree?  I hope so as a child IS a person.  Therefore, why are ALL children made to start school at 4 or 5?  I know children learn best under the age of 7 (I studied Psychology at University before becoming ill).  However, what gives Britain the right to force children to start school at 4 or 5?  Surely the things that children learn under the age of 7 should be the way to live a happy life, rather than how to read and write.  I know, in America, there are some children with very high IQs who graduate from University before they are even old enough for High school, they are a prime example of my point.  If they were forced to go through the British school system, their potential would have been lost because it is not ‘doing it by the book’.  What book?!  The rules the government set in order to make everybody reach their academic potential, not necessarily their happiest LIFE potential!

I do not think that every child starting at 7 would work either but why do we not allow the parents to have the control over when their child starts?  They know their own child better than any nursery teacher, politician or doctor.  By doing this, I think, there would be classes of mixed age groups, mixed cultures, mixes genders.  I also think this would make the children happier and feel less like a failure if they can’t do something because they are not as clever as class mates.  Every child has the potential to be ‘perfect’.  But whose version of ‘perfect’ is right?  Yours?  Mine?  A homeless teenager’s?  The Queen’s?  Whose?

I think the only people that can be ‘perfect’ are ones who are not prejudice at all!  Which neither you, nor any other of the political parties in Britain, can claim to be! 

Conservatives; discriminate against the population of Britain who are the product of generations being dragged up through our supposed ‘democratic’ system but not one that had the chance to reach their potential in an academic sense as they were not ready to learn when they started school so rebelled against teachers and authority from a young age, so don’t want to vote or even understand how to.

Labour; discriminate against the fortunate population in Britain to have a decent monetary worth in this country, and generally, voters for the Conservatives.  They try to encourage the working class they are just as important as the rest of the population.  I agree they are, if not of more importance.  Working class people NEED to work!  If they are lucky enough to have had an easy start to life and have the qualifications to get their ‘dream’ job, they are more important to the society than those with the job they were made to stick with.

Liberal Democrats; discriminate against every single person that voted FOR them in the last election by signing with yourselves instead of Labour.  I know you were the popular option because people were all against Labour but, in reality, the policies you both have are too different to lead to a happier place to live.

Here are some worrying statistics...

There are an estimated 50,000,000 adults in Britain, yet less than 30,000,000 people voted.  What about the rest of the population?  They either didn’t want to vote or didn’t understand the importance of voting.  Neither of which is the individuals fault!

After all the ‘scandal’ happening within parliament over the last few years, mainly the expenses fiasco, people who do understand the importance of voting couldn’t care less anymore because they say “politicians are all the same”.  They are right.  Every politician believes they know the answer to Britain’s problems.  But they don’t!  They might be well educated and from a long line of success, much like yourself.  Generally, I think, money rules what decisions are made by the government, we are always hearing about budgets and government cuts.  Why is money so important?!  It is the ‘root of all evil’ or so the saying says, not a weapon to use against others.

As for people who do not understand the importance of voting, they tend to be those without a good education.  Nothing they could control when growing up, as they were forced to do certain things at a certain age, instead of when they were mentally ready to start learning the academic side of life.  By academic, I don’t mean learning mathematics, science, history, and any other subject we are told we HAVE to study.  I simply mean the side of life that means they need to know the way certain things work in order to make their lives happy.  Being able to read, write and do basic maths is important to function in today’s world.  The internet is used more than anything else, so people need to know how to find out what they need to know. Put simply, a person without the skill to read, write and do basic maths will always feel like a failure because they will always feel cut off from society and the rest of the world.

I think we can all safely say that the current ‘system’ in Britain is not working!  The more you do as Prime Minister, stuck in your ways as a conservative leader, without any room for sympathy, will break the country more and we will end up killing each other!!

I think that the 3 main parties in Britain should put their ego aside and ALL join forces, EQUALLY!  There should be no prime minister.  Just three main advisors that democratically come up with new laws, rules and ‘traditions’ that will help ‘fix’ Britain without having to completely destroy it first!

Throughout this letter I have referred to our country as Britain.  It is actually Great Britain but I deliberately left out the ‘Great’ at each reference as I do not THINK this country is Great, but I do like my life in the UK.  Why can we not concentrate on being a United Kingdom, instead of everyone forced to be ‘Great’ British, and anyone that fails anywhere along the line either physically or mentally, will feel like complete failures and the only way out, as they cannot afford to leave the country, is death. 

By putting “suicide rates uk 2010” into Google, there is a long list of articles in newspapers, reporting an increase in suicide within Britain.  Adult statistics seem to always surround money; whether that is losing a job, getting in so much debt that they feel they have no other option, or living on benefits and feeling stupid just because they cannot get a ‘good’ job because of their education.  There is the other side of suicide, children and teenagers.  All the cases of suicide I know of; be it personally or through news programmes, are linked to some form of bullying.  This does not happen to be a coincidence.  Young people feel they have no control over their own life when they are being bullied, I know, I was bullied from 5 until 16 at school and then again when I got a ‘proper’ job because I wasn’t good at getting sales.

The only control we, as individuals, have over our life is whether we live or die.  I have been suicidal many times throughout my younger life.  However, I always talked myself out of it as I knew it would upset my mum as we were very close.  I could imagine what it would do to her so I just kept quiet, for her sake.

Instead of complaining to everybody I care for and being locked up in a mental hospital, or labelled as Schizophrenic, I decided to share my thought with the only man in this country that COULD actually do something about it. 

I can’t; I am a 26 year old MS, depression and anxiety sufferer who has tried my entire life to do the ‘right’ thing and my body gave up before I had the chance to get to where I was meant to be, my purpose in life!  Instead of giving up at many low points throughout my life, I kept going and I am now glad that I did as I am truly happy and the only thing that has made me happy is finally being honest with MYSELF in my head instead of just going along with things like we are expected to.  My head and heart are finally on the same page and I intend to use my new way of thinking as a positive thing instead of a negative.  This is what led to me writing this letter.

I would very much appreciate an HONEST reply from yourself with the option to reply with my opinion on the way you reply to me.

Everyone is entitled to their opinion, we have got the right to freedom of speech, I just wanted my opinion to be told to the man at the top, rather than driving my nearest and dearest mad with my constant talking about things I know can be changed.

disabled people are not useless!

I have grown up quite happily in Britain.  I might not have had the best of starts in life but I reckon I've turned out pretty good! Apart from the small issue of having MS and needing help with things around the house!

It really frustrates me when I can't do something! At the moment, my hip is playing up quite a lot.  I refuse to let this dictate to me how I should live my life, despite the dribble of money that the Government expects me to live on. The only good thing to come out of my illness, well two things really. My car, which makes my life SO much easier; and my now ex-fiancée. We both have unusual forms of MS and met through a mutual friend, who suffers with the debilitating illness NMO (Neuromyelitis Optica/Devic's Disease). You probably have never heard of this before in your life so if you can be bothered, Google it; if not, it's pretty horrible! Can end up blind and it can also be fatal.

My ex and I started to email each other, she was a shoulder to cry on when I was so frustrated about my body not managing to talk to my head properly! I would say one thing in my head and my body just decided to ignore my head! I know I probably sound mad, I'm not! I just had to let off steam when things were getting on top of me, which seemed to be happening a LOT at that point in time!

Anyway, long story short, about 6 or 7 months later, she told me she loved me in more than a friends type of way.  I was flattered and realised I felt the same way so we decided to make a go of it! About 8 months later we were engaged, living together and flying high...or so I thought!

It took me until I was with her to realise I needed anti-depressants. My head was so muddled up after all the hassle I had been through since falling ill! My neurologist kept putting me on weird treatments, like Cyclophosphamide (a form of chemotherapy) and was even looking at more complex treatments to try and 'help' me! I felt like a guinea pig! It made me more determined to beat whatever it was that was making me ill and live 'happily ever after'.

I smoke cannabis for the pain caused by whatever illness was causing me to have a complicated life! I got a fact pack thing from the hospital about MS because that was the way they were starting to look. My particular neurologist was the MS specialist for the region in my area so I thought he is probably the best one to trust! How wrong was I?! I soon realised (well 4 years later), that I was just going along with every medication he chose to 'try' me on. I didn't read side effects on ANY tablet I was put on because then I would never have left the house because the smallest thing that happened, I would be at doctors trying to get another drug to 'help' that side effect.

After meeting my ex, we smoked a LOT more cannabis because it was the only thing that we could both agree would help our pain, anxiety and mental state of mind! It was the BEST escape I had ever experienced! For those few hours every night I felt like I could do cartwheels if I wanted to. Generally, all I did was sit on the sofa, making stupid videos and watching stupid movies. For those few hours, I was so happy!!

My ex started wanting to smoke it all day every day. Sometimes, I let her but I had to drive so thought it was probably best not to smoke it until after our night time meal so we could actually have a life that didn't rotate around an expensive class B drug! I had my sensible head on sometimes! Haha

When you smoke too much cannabis, it makes you sick! I spent a week of just drinking water and throwing up, couldn't take tablets, do my injection for my MS or anything. But I didn't care. My head felt like it was about to explode! I started writing things down. Might have gone through a mini nervous breakdown, but in my head, I had never been clearer! Everything in my life had finally made sense! Was weird. In fact, I'm not sure how my ex managed to stay all the way through it without calling the looney bin! I don't blame her for leaving me.

Now though, I have a much clearer head and can see how to solve my life problems! I might have MS and be 'disabled' but it doesn't mean my head is stupid! I can still use a computer so life will be just fine! It's a lot less stressful to be disabled in Britain than be Prime Minister!

I do, however, think that the government need to look after disabled people a bit better.  Just because I got ill at a young age and don't use a wheelchair, I have been pretty much told that if I don't return to work then I am useless! I have tried MANY times to better myself.  I got struck down with MS just before 2nd year at Uni was about to start.  I had 18 months off and then returned, part time though.  I was happy to be back learning but, after 6 months or so, I was forced to give up for good because the stress was causing my legs to start getting worse again quite rapidly. It was a choice between body and mind really. I realised that I didn't have to be in University to learn things so decided it was more important to me that I was able to walk and have as 'normal' an existence as I could manage.

So, with my body not being able to handle the pressures of University, I was forced to give in and admit I have MS and would probably never cope with a job as my body is unable to handle stress! I claim benefits. Most people would probably say that's acceptable, well, most NORMAL people! Not the government! I was told to go to a centre to help me get around to going back to work. Nobody in the 'system' understood that to me, and many other disabled people in a similar boat, work was too physically and mentally tiring to manage on top of everything else we cope with on a daily basis!

I would LOVE to work, I have always wanted to be a primary school teacher! Instead of being depressed about the fact that I cannot fulfil my childhood dream, I now spend more time with the children in my family. It helps me forget for a few hours that I am so sore. Instead of doing lots of things that cost money, I tend to have them to stay with me for a night to give their parents a break and watch dvds and play games in the house. I also spend time with my best friend's two little ones too. My friend and I are in similar financial situations, we both have to live on benefits, so finding cheaper things to do is not as hard as I would have guessed. Today, for example, we went swimming. It does cost money but it is a great way to tire the little ones out and, as it is in water, it serves a dual purpose of helping me exercise without too much pain. Other days though, when I am not too sore, we take them to the park, or do craft things indoors, or just go for a drive and little walk somewhere.

Having my car, courtesy of the Motability charity, has made life a LOT easier. I used to rely on taxis to take me places. I live on a steep hill so trying to walk down or up the hill is painful, even when my hip is not as bad as it is now. There is an hourly bus service, which I tried to use as much as I could. However, I suffer with a form of Acrophobia so, being forced to stay out longer than I need to be in a busy place is my form of hell! My Acrophobia has only developed since I got ill, I was always a VERY sociable person, from a young age. My friends that are around the same age as me like to go out to pubs and clubs which is classed as 'normal' in this country and I never used to complain! :-) Since getting ill though, I have a panic attack style reaction to being in busy pubs, let alone a club! People are also very rude so it puts me off because drunk people are worse!

When I first got ill, I walked with one elbow crutch so people could see I was disabled but, through hard work at physio, and at home, I got off my crutch and was walking unaided after about a year or so. I am a bigger person so people can't miss me! I am also 26 and don't dress in a grown up 26 year old way because baggy jeans and hoody makes my life easier for getting dressed and going out so I choose to wear them. It is like I am completely invisible to EVERYONE! In a pub, people would walk in to me, barge past me, knock one of my legs or hit me in the back, not on purpose though.  In shops, the same things happened! Anywhere that was busy really. The thing that got me was that the same people would at least have said sorry if I had my crutch but I refuse to use an aid to walk when I don't have to! I know it would make people realise I wasn't just being grumpy when they walked in to me but I don't want to make my body get lazy and get a lot worse just because I was trying to show people I am disabled! I know MS sufferers tend to end up in wheelchairs but I don't want to encourage it to happen to my body faster than it has to, if at all!

Now the new Sativex drug for MS patient has been licensed, I thought I could get that and stop smoking cannabis as it is a cannabis based medication. I was wrong. I tried talking to my MS nurse about it and she said to try another drug first, as the rules said that a patient had to have been tried, and failed, on 2 antispasmatic medications. I never understood that rule seen as I had PROOF that cannabis helped me! None the less, I was happy to go along with it. When the nurse discussed it with my consultant, he said no and told me to go to physio again! It felt like I was just going in circles so...I wrote him a letter!

It was really long, telling him EXACTLY what I thought about him and that I would stop taking all of my prescription medications, including my MS injection, if he didn't at least consider letting me do a TRIAL on the drug. His response made me laugh. He didn't like my 'tone' of letter so I now have a new consultant! RESULT!!! haha. I haven't seen him yet but, when I do, he is going to discuss Sativex. Why do doctors play God with people's quality of life?! Nobody, apart from me, can tell me what to do with MY body!

So, after my letter to my consultant got him to LISTEN for once...I wrote one to David Cameron telling him my opinion too!! It was a loooooooooooong letter! Not in an offensive way though, that doesn't get anybody to listen!! I also wrote another letter, justifying my opinion using life experiences of me and close friends and family! I have still not heard from him! I do not want to blackmail him, or even claim credit for my opinion, I simply want him to realise that people who CANNOT work, are not useless, and treat us better!

Motability is a great charity! I would be lost without my batmobile (I have batman logo on bonnet). I agree with the government stopping rises in petrol prices, it's about time! However, they set VAT to 20% so prices on most other stuff has jumped up! I understand that the government have lots of hard decisions to make about budgets etc but they NEVER take pay cuts! Why can't they be paid a lower salary and give people who deserve the money a little bit more to live on! I'm not suggesting minimum wage, although that would make me happy too, I am simply saying they should not be paid large salaries for being a politician, if they really wanted to be in politics for the RIGHT reasons they couldn't possibly object to such a suggestion! All politicians should be more interested in creating a more peaceful country to live in for EVERYONE than about how much money they can con out of the tax payer by claiming expenses for the STUPIDEST things! Even now, there was a report not long ago about the new things politicians would be able to claim! WHAT?!! They don't get enough already?! If their expense claims were done as strictly as a shop or a bank, the country wouldn't be as money orientated as it is because our supposed 'leaders' wouldn't be showing the population that claiming falsely is acceptable!

Why did it not cross ANY of the people's minds that were claiming fraudulent expenses that what they were doing was wrong? Why did nobody feel bad about claiming money for staff or rent on a house they didn't even LIVE in? Why are such idiots in charge of the budgets for NHS and councils? That's a scary thought!!! Every party was guilty of it so why should we trust ANY of them?

Why does every person that isn't 'perfect' have to feel like a failure? Why are we so obsessed with 'perfection'? There is no such thing! Every single person in the world has their own flaw! It is NORMAL! Anybody that cannot admit their own flaw, is a liar! So the only way to appear 'perfect' is to lie?

My flaw is that I can't work! But, in order to get the benefits to live in this country, disabled people have to use their 'worst' day as a reference when filling out forms. My worst day is not leaving house because I am too sore to walk about in my flat, let alone go outside on to the uneven pavements or roads! However, if I am out and about people will say "you look well" or something as obviously stupid. Nobody sees me on a 'bad' day though, not even my mum! Writing stuff on the form is harder because I hate the feeling that I am lying but I'm not!

Disabled people are not benefit cheats but, without a wheelchair or crutch, people are so judgemental and prejudice that they assume they are a 'bum' that doesn't want to work! I would LOVE to have a degree and be teaching or at least training but MS is not a very easy illness to live with on a daily basis with all the 'invisible' symptoms so my dream will possibly NEVER come true but I am happy trying to just live life to the full and get on with the life I have got while I have it.

I hope David Cameron does reply soon, I will write him a new letter every month until he does if I have to, or every week! I just want him to consider someone else's perspective on life in Britain!

expenses!

OH MY GOD!!

How can MPs be allowed to claim MORE expenses?! If they were paid minimum wage or something then I could understand! If they want to be in politics, on stupid salaries, they should be prepared to cover their own expenses!

I can hardly see any average job offering expenses for staff and a second house?!! If they need to be in London, surely they should just be put up in a hotel for a night or two? Travelodge doesn't cost that much!

It annoys me that some men in suits spending the day shouting at each other and get paid more than a disabled person or a young family on benefits do in a week.

Seriously, this country is on the brink of collapse.  Politicians think that people who live on benefits are a 'drain' on society.  It is society's fault that they are as they are! The education and/or social work systems have failed them at some point in their childhood. Because they do not have a piece of paper to say they can do something means they will, quite possibly, be discouraged to apply for jobs.  Most employers, I think, would much rather hire the person with at least a few school qualifications than the one with none and no work history!

love your family more than others!

I have lived my entire life being jealous of people.  I know this sounds petty but it's the truth!

I was born into a very loving family but my dad left when I was under 2.  Any time anything happened, like bullying or falling down, my mum was awesome at helping me get through it! She supported ANYTHING that I chose to do.  Was the best at awarding me when I done well, was the most supportive person when I felt unwell.  I loved her so much!  I still do and I will until the day that I die! She is the single most important person in my life! :)

Thanks mum for the last 26 years! :)

What 'superpower' did Batman have?

MONEY!!!

He didn't fly, he didn't have webs coming out of his hands, he had a cape but then so did dracula so a cape doesn't make you 'super'!
The main thing he had was money!! He was a rich man so had his head screwed on if he used it for the greater good!

WE CAN ALL BE BATMAN!!

You just have to think about it!